Once a upon a time, I had a panic attack

This post might seem a little out of topic since this is a bipolar blog but bipolar disorder usually co-morbids with anxiety disorders so I thought that I can try posting this here.

It has been a long time since I was last diagnosed and I’m still having problems trying to tie the various symptoms to the state of my mental health. Before I knew a panic attack for what it was, I’ve always thought that I was having a heart attack. The extreme pain in the chest, shortness of breath, giddiness, accelerated heart beat and trembling hands just screamed heart-attack, or some kind of heart problem and yes, I thought that this was the end of my sorry life. Now that I think of it, how foolish a thought.

Now, the symptoms can be scary when it strikes and I was clueless, so me being the ever paranoid person that I was, went crawling to every doctor I could get my grubby hands on, shrieking that I was going to die from this horrible, horrible disease. I was put through countless ECGs, X-Rays and blood tests before I was finally sent to a cardiologist, who told me straight out that I was ok after a brief 5 minute examination. Did I believe him? No, because the attacks continued! But visits to several more doctors (yes, I’m that stubborn) had only sealed the fact that I’m indeed, perfectly healthy. It was after I've landed myself in a psychiatrist’s office that I finally had a name for this unknown affliction. A panic attack, that was what it was. I stared at the psychiatrist like he was crazy, even though I was the crazy one. I told him I wasn’t even panicking about anything, why the hell would I have a panic attack when there was nothing to panic about? Well, apparently you didn’t need a reason to have a panic attack and Google agreed.

So here I am, just a little wiser than before, enough to know that I'm not going to die when a panic attack strikes. I've haven't had a panic attack since I've gotten my bipolar disorder under control. Actually, now that I look back... I wonder why I never thought to send myself to the hospital during an attack, maybe a doctor at A&E would have been able to identify a panic attack when he sees one. Maybe that's why it took me nine years before I thought I needed to see a psychiatrist. I always thought that I could handle it. I guess I was wrong.

If you're experiencing similar problems and it has been affecting you for a long time, do check with your doctor, don't try to handle it yourself. If he/she finds nothing wrong with you, you can always suggest that maybe you're panic attack and see what they can do for you. It'll save you a lot of pain and suffering from doing so.